#humor

Played without any irony at all of course.

I started a McDonald’s franchise where I get steady yet decent income. I no longer stress about layoffs. I just hope you guys can come to my McDonald’s buy my Big Macs!

Wish they had a better dress sense for the “Global Townhall.” I’ve seen McDonald’s managers dress better than these executives. 😂

So please don't go (to Ameriprise), don't go
Don't go away
Please don't go, don't go
I'm begging you to stay (at your job)

Maybe we shouldnt worry about layoffs, we'll all be gone anyway.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/ckgwy1k42w4o

The cringe level is off the charts in this one hahaha

I know it's to micromanage us to death but the fact that we need a dozen apps to put cookies on the shelf is hysterical. This isn't some fancy job it's a simple physical job. Order cookies. Put cookies on shelf. It's ridiculous.

Sadly all too familiar - https://www.facebook.com/reel/907707882030791

Time for the trimester update!

Predictions:

• PP may or may not be there, but will at the very least have a pre-recorded message and be wearing a blazer with at no less than 3 gaudy colors.
• The phrase "We hear you, we feel you..." will get overused.

What do you predict?

Our indian friend Arvind is about to anounce the rename of the company to International Id--ts Machines.

This name sounds so much better according to the current situstion of the company plently of id--ts.

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/jcW-WvVGWuU

Just noticed this as a headline on the Intranet, had to click on it and was expecting some great motivational words of wisdom from DW, but no this was talking about rebooting your computer twice per week.

Just noticed this as a headline on the Intranet, had to click on it and was expecting some great motivational words of wisdom from DW, but no this was talking about rebooting your computer twice per week.

Just checking in on my old Crown family. I hear things are going… great.

Culture at an all-time low.
More reorgs. More layoff rumors.
Eight job openings.
Stock anxiety.
People asking, “Why are you still here?”
And apparently SpaceX may need 1.5 MILLION small cells.

😳

Now I’m not saying I told y’all so about small cells…

But I did tell y’all so about small cells.

Repeatedly.

Then Elliott showed up and apparently somebody decided, “You know what this company needs? LESS GROWTH.”

Bold strategy. 😂

Back in my day we had towers, fiber, small cells, arguments, problems, purple everywhere — and somehow people still did the damn work.

Now I’m reading headlines like:

“Crown Culture at an All-Time Low”
“What’s Next?”
“Stock is Suffering”
“Hollow Words and Heavy Workloads”
“Why Are You Still Here?”

Good Lord, people. I leave for a minute… 😂

Meanwhile, I’m doing great.

Building homes for families with my buddy David and friends. 🏠
Raising six kids.
Helping save babies.
Trying to do the work the Lord calls me to do.

Turns out I may have picked a pretty good time to leave corporate America.

But I genuinely miss y’all — and I’ll always have a soft spot for the years we spent Living the Purple Life. 💜

Which does leave me with one question:

What color are y’all living now?

Because judging by these headlines, it sure as he-l ain’t purple.

Love y’all.
— Your boy JayB

Is the only word that can describe PayPal

I mean we match on colors and both have a clowns running the show.

This video popped on in my queue yesterday by comedian Mike Polk talking about the Cleveland Browns. He refers to the stadium as a Factory of Sadness.

https://youtu.be/tRBDMMVctu8?is=tXMzBXiPacbMlXNI

And I thought holy $hit, that’s Wells Fargo. A factory of sadness.

LOL. They got tired of planting employee questions from the audience. Playing Jeopardy - made up their own questions to answer. Too funny.

Everybody at IBM should be tokenmaxing, or bobcoinmaxing… it does not matter what you do with Bob , make sure you use all your Bob coins every month.

🍲 Starter: Jargon soup
🍽️ Main course: Store visits
🥗 Side: Scorecard salad — results free
🍰 Dessert: Scoops of accents

Fortress of solitude

https://youtube.com/shorts/XK3xIjofxZ0?is=uJCfw1x5fbsKjKyW

Wow.. For someone who went to Brown.....

It's funny to thing that Legg thinks he is the next CEO

https://x.com/RespectfulMemes/status/2091276978003546205

Find this funny and ironic this notification going on for months on the employee IT support slack channel. Looks like Ai agents ate going a great job after getting rid of humans.

Our CEO didn’t get GM initials for nothing .

G.M:
Good Man
Great Mentor
Generous millionaire
Giving Man
Godly Man
Good-looking man
Even “My Guy”is GM backwards lol

As Tina would sing … Your simply the best..🎶🎶🎶 Better than all the rest 🎶🎶
Better than anyone… anyone I’ve ever met!

And to all the fat and miserable haters from Minnesota, go back to McDonalds, get a happy meal !LOL

1) Why are you simping for your executive overlords?

2) How does the boot taste?

3) Do you salt the leather?

4) Do you prefer the heel or the toe?

Asking for a friend. TIA!

🤫

Just saying, so much fluff OMG

U of M should be DIMBY (Datacenter In My Back Yard). The students will get faster Chat GPT results with the datacenter so close.

Since you're reading this.

Men are leaving the workforce at alarming rates, threatening social stability.

44.07 million eligible men are not in the labor force, an increase of 9 million since 2012.

The workforce participation rate for men dropped to 66.8%, the lowest since 1948.

Bottom Line

Both entities suffer from the same fatal flaw: an obsession with defending legacy turf at the expense of sustainable growth. When leadership views customers and competitors as hostile land-grabbers, strategy devolves into pure protectionism, and eventually, the ranch runs out of money to keep the fence up.

The Spoiler

Verizon will ultimately be sold just like the Yellowstone ranch. Leave the ranch before you're forced to.

Lloyd

​Network Operations & Infrastructure as Rip

​The Shared Flaw: Blind loyalty to muscle over strategy.

​The Parallels: Rip is the fixer who relies on blunt force and absolute enforcement to solve problems. Verizon’s network engineering arm operates with a similar "brand-at-all-costs" muscle, leaning heavily on the legacy "most reliable network" moniker while pounding away at capital expenditure. They fix structural leaks through sheer spend and infrastructure brute force, ignoring the fact that consumer patience is wearing dangerously thin.

Consumer & Marketing Leadership as Beth

The Shared Flaw: Combative pricing tactics and unapologetic hostility.

The Parallels: Beth Dutton’s strategy for handling opponents is sheer we-ponized aggression. Verizon’s consumer pricing and marketing strategy reflects that exact scorched-earth mindset: squeezing existing customers with surprise administrative fees, mandatory plan migrations, and stealth price hikes rather than innovating to win them over. It is an "eat-or-be-eaten" approach that treats customer retention like a hostage negotiation.

Alfonso as Sarah/ Market Equities Corporate Fixers

The Shared Flaw: Cold corporate restructuring and ruthless efficiency over human impact.

The Parallels: Brought in to spearhead massive enterprise transformations, restructure operations, and enforce AI and digital optimization, Alfonso represents the outside corporate force brought into the ranch. Much like the ruthless operatives at Market Equities or fixers like Sarah Atwood, his playbook focuses purely on cold metrics, aggressive streamlining, cost-cutting, and institutional overhaul. This laser-focus on efficiency treats front-line workforce reductions and radical shifts in customer engagement as simple, necessary collateral damage.

​Hans as Jamie

​The Shared Flaw: Costly miscalculations and desperate self-preservation.

​The Parallels: Hans spent years engineering massive, budget-straining land grabs—namely his $52 billion bet on C-Band 5G spectrum and the $20 billion Frontier acquisition—much like Jamie’s legal and political maneuvering that consistently backed the ranch into financial corners. Now relegated to a sidelined advisor role, Hans mirrors Jamie’s tragic trajectory: the architect who thought he was securing the empire's legacy, only to be stripped of authority when the strategy proved painfully expensive.

​If Verizon ran the Yellowstone Dutton Ranch, quarterly earnings calls would sound like land-war council meetings, and price hikes would be enforced at the train station.

​Comparing Verizon's leadership landscape, navigating subscriber churn, massive debt, price inflation, and fierce 5G competition, to the flawed, ruthless cast of Yellowstone reveals striking parallels in how both protect their respective empires.

​Dan as John

​The Shared Flaw: Entrenched stubbornness and forced transition.

​The Parallels: Just as John Dutton fights tooth and nail to defend the boundaries of the ranch against modern shifts, Dan took the reins to salvage an aging telecommunications titan facing subscriber erosion and fierce price wars. Both act as heavy-handed patriarchs brought in to enforce discipline, consolidate power, and demand total compliance across all business units, often viewing changing market dynamics as something to be subdued rather than adaptively embraced.

​If Verizon ran the Yellowstone Dutton Ranch, quarterly earnings calls would sound like land-war council meetings, and price hikes would be enforced at the train station.

​Comparing Verizon's leadership landscape, navigating subscriber churn, massive debt, price inflation, and fierce 5G competition, to the flawed, ruthless cast of Yellowstone reveals striking parallels in how both protect their respective empires.

​Dan as John

​The Shared Flaw: Entrenched stubbornness and forced transition.

​The Parallels: Just as John Dutton fights tooth and nail to defend the boundaries of the ranch against modern shifts, Dan took the reins to salvage an aging telecommunications titan facing subscriber erosion and fierce price wars. Both act as heavy-handed patriarchs brought in to enforce discipline, consolidate power, and demand total compliance across all business units—often viewing changing market dynamics as something to be subdued rather than adaptively embraced.

​Hans as Jamie

​The Shared Flaw: Costly miscalculations and desperate self-preservation.

​The Parallels: Hans spent years engineering massive, budget-straining land grabs—namely his $52 billion bet on C-Band 5G spectrum and the $20 billion Frontier acquisition—much like Jamie’s legal and political maneuvering that consistently backed the ranch into financial corners. Now relegated to a sidelined advisor role, Hans mirrors Jamie’s tragic trajectory: the architect who thought he was securing the empire's legacy, only to be stripped of authority when the strategy proved painfully expensive.

​Alfonso as Sarah/ Market Equities Corporate Fixers

​The Shared Flaw: Cold corporate restructuring and ruthless efficiency over human impact.

​The Parallels: Brought in to spearhead massive enterprise transformations, restructure operations, and enforce AI and digital optimization, Alfonso represents the outside corporate force brought into the ranch. Much like the ruthless operatives at Market Equities or fixers like Sarah Atwood, his playbook focuses purely on cold metrics, aggressive streamlining, cost-cutting, and institutional overhaul. This laser-focus on efficiency treats front-line workforce reductions and radical shifts in customer engagement as simple, necessary collateral damage.

​Consumer & Marketing Leadership as Beth

​The Shared Flaw: Combative pricing tactics and unapologetic hostility.

​The Parallels: Beth Dutton’s strategy for handling opponents is sheer we-ponized aggression. Verizon’s consumer pricing and marketing strategy reflects that exact scorched-earth mindset: squeezing existing customers with surprise administrative fees, mandatory plan migrations, and stealth price hikes rather than innovating to win them over. It is an "eat-or-be-eaten" approach that treats customer retention like a hostage negotiation.

​Network Operations & Infrastructure as Rip

​The Shared Flaw: Blind loyalty to muscle over strategy.

​The Parallels: Rip is the fixer who relies on blunt force and absolute enforcement to solve problems. Verizon’s network engineering arm operates with a similar "brand-at-all-costs" muscle, leaning heavily on the legacy "most reliable network" moniker while pounding away at capital expenditure. They fix structural leaks through sheer spend and infrastructure brute force, ignoring the fact that consumer patience is wearing dangerously thin.

​Bottom Line

​Both entities suffer from the same fatal flaw: an obsession with defending legacy turf at the expense of sustainable growth. When leadership views customers and competitors as hostile land-grabbers, strategy devolves into pure protectionism, and eventually, the ranch runs out of money to keep the fence up.

​The Spoiler

​Verizon will ultimately be sold just like the Yellowstone ranch. Leave the ranch before you're forced to.

Lloyd

This issue needs to be addressed before the new AT&T headquarters in Plano opens.

The Plano campus will have pickleball courts, which means employees may soon be competing against one another on a regular basis. However, virtual employees already have a major advantage: they do not have to spend up to two hours each day commuting to and from the Dallas headquarters.

While the rest of us are sitting in traffic, virtual employees could be using that time to practice their serves, improve their game, and prepare for the Plano courts. By the time the new headquarters opens, employees who have been commuting may be years behind in pickleball development.

This creates a serious fairness issue. The Plano pickleball courts should be a level playing field, but that will not be possible if one group has had significantly more time to practice simply because of where they work.

Leadership needs to act now, before the competitive gap becomes impossible to close. I am requesting that virtual employees return to the office so everyone has the same commuting obligations and the same opportunity to prepare.

We cannot wait until the first Plano pickleball tournament to realize that this problem should have been handled sooner. The integrity of AT&T pickleball is at stake and the time to act is now before it is too late.