#sarcasm

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My wife is leaving me...

She says it's because I don't give her enough attention but she doesn't understand core Cisco principles, and that contributing to increased collaboration in the office & increasing shareholder value is my life's purpose.

I asked Circuit if it can help me but produced no helpful results.

I have too much responsibility in the company, I cannot afford to start any later than 8am and finish any later than 6:30pm, that and being on call every weekend, which I cannot miss out on as the company depends on me.

What is the solution to this P1 incident?


Time to make things HAPPEN! Q4 is going to be amazing!

Manager ask you for something by end of day? Get it done by end of HOUR.

Manager needs it by end of hour? It's already in his inbox, unread, marked urgent, sent from your phone while you were being wheeled into a routine outpatient procedure!

There are 24 hours in a day. Sleep is a SUBSCRIPTION and I've cancelled mine. You people act like you never pulled an all-nighter in college and took a final on three Red Bulls and a stranger's Adderall. That was PRACTICE. This is the exam!!!

Cisco routers run 24/7 with 99.999% uptime. Are you telling me a METAL BOX has better work ethic than us? Heck no!

Cisco hired you for a reason. WHO'S GONNA CARRY THE ROUTERS?! AND THE LOGS?

CISCO ON THREE!

One.

Two.

Get back to work.


#lifeatBNY

Hello friends and colleagues. I would like to apologise. Yesterday for the first time in 7 years I forgot to post a meaningless #lifeatbny LinkedIn post. After our recent inspiring and uplifting “Ask me Anything” with RV (as long as it’s pre approved meaningless questions that don’t challenge the narrative) I had resolved to double down on my “look at me I love BNy” LinkedIn posts. I hope that my lack of LinkedIn post yesterday did not discourage, demotivate , or cause anyone in my team to wonder wait does she still love the company or not. So sincere apologies to all. #lovelifeatbny #lookatme #proffessionalbootlicker


Congratulations for a YTD Return of +1.03% !!!!

I would like to congratulate the PEP team for this outstanding achievement. This is truly a testament to your dedication, leadership and passion for winning ! Not every organization with a Market Cap of $194B and 300,000 employees worldwide is capable of providing a lower rate of return to its investors than a Money Market fund. Although this may not create smiles for our investors, who cares, it's important to remember that change is difficult and just achieving this small positive number is something you can all be proud of. Let's try for +1.04 in the last 4 months of 2026 !


MetLife is really good at this

Our SLT is just so damn good at mandating the people who ACTUALLY DO THE WORK attend repetitive meetings. Apparently it's not enough to have the CEO, CFO, HR head, various EVPs pat themselves on the back for all of the wonderful things they do to make our lives easier (yes, this is sarcasm), they need to take turns leading meetings several times a month to repeat the same delusional cr-p. I just can't do this anymore. This company is so absurd.


Retirement Buyout

Comrades, I urge you to take the retirement buyout for all International employees. The UK Workplace Pension, French Plan épargne Retraite and the US 401 are fully funded but the International is not. This will be offered once before we freeze and cancel the International Plan. You have been forewarned. Offer expires in August.


Can you apply to AT&T after being surplussed?

Just curious can you apply to AT&T after being surplussed? Or are the doors likely closed forever from this company. I feel like out off all of the candidates out there you would be best positioned to re-enter AT&T given how much specialized telecommunications knowledge you would have about fiber and wireless.


VZ Stock Down

Vz stock is down 0.72% today on news Verizon is breaking the mold to put our customers first. Verizon has a great track record of success such as last year’s project 624 which was the biggest customer experience transformation in the company’s history. All the executives posting and reposting our huge win today makes me delighted! These leaders are truly rockstars and highly respected and admired! Proud to be vz. Way to go team!!!!


Appreciation Monday

What a way to start the week. I received a personal ecard from BE How sweet, knowing she appreciates me showing up with heart every time

She appreciates everyone, even the Inconsistently meets! That card means so much to me, way better than a salary increase

I'll miss that wretched $&@!/


Great Q1 2026 earnings report!

Great job ! Congratulations to all of you. Exceptional planning and execution! Tony and team, you are showing the retail industry how "The smallest stone can make a ripple in the water". You on on your way to creating a tsunami! Taking the bull by the horns and restructuring with Incredible Insight!


Ford should exclusively focus selling cars to people with Credit history scores < 50. Most likely they will

miss a car payment and car will be repo. If Ford got into the repo gig they could turn around and run these cars they repo through Dealer or Public auctions. If Ford goes the public auction route, they should only sell the repos AS-WHERE IS, no implied warranty what-so-ever.

You have to admit this is a great idea. Not even Dave Calohoun, the train wreck CEO fired by Boeing who's wanting to be named Ford next CEO could have thought of this.