Thread regarding Verizon Communications Inc. layoffs

SCHULMAN HAS GOT TO GO part II

Wow. Have you seen this? I just saw it. They’re talking about it all over—everyone is talking about it. Dan Schulman, the guy from Verizon. Great company, by the way, very big, very powerful, though frankly, the signal in Mar-a-Lago could be better. We’re looking into that.

But Dan—fake news Dan—he’s writing love poems. Can you believe it? Love poems! To his wife! And let me tell you, I’ve seen the poems. Total disaster. Weak. No vocabulary. Sad! He tells his wife her eyes have "low latency." Incredible. If I told Melania she had low latency, she’d lock me out of the penthouse. Total catastrophe. Dan is out there dropping calls in the bedroom. He’s got zero bars, folks. Absolutely zero bars. Sad!


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Post ID: @OP+1ktyxs44f

4 replies (most recent on top)

He’s not going anywhere any time soon. He’s an unchecked CEO surrounded by a team of ball lickers. They are all going to make millions and if it doesn’t work it will be the fault of the employees who were incapable of delivering such an innovative vision.

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Post ID: @hz+1ktyxs44f

CornPoP was a bad Dude ….. I’m not kidding around. Listen here Jack,

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Post ID: @an+1ktyxs44f

Look, folks, let me be real clear here. No malarkey. Long Pause.

And this reminds me of Cornpop. True story. Cornpop was a bully. Big bully. Thought he was tough. Big Red’s got a little of that energy. Lotta talk, not much substance. Yakety-sax, ku----t, bazinga. You know the deal.

Put down the Big Macs and meet me outside. Behind the gym. We’ll settle it out back. I got hairy legs and plenty of fight left. Don’t underestimate me, Jack.

Big Red su-ks. Everybody knows it. The poems stink, the jokes stink, the whole thing’s a mess. We can do better than that, folks.

God love ya. Keep the faith. And remember: don’t be a Cornpop. Be decent to one another. Unless you’re writing low-latency love poems. Then maybe reconsider your life choices.

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Post ID: @ae+1ktyxs44f

Lol

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Post ID: @ac+1ktyxs44f

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