Guys I need everyone to hop on for an emergency meeting. My boss needs a 200 page deck tonight to meet with their boss at 8am tomorrow morning to discuss today’s key pivotal critical learnings from the massive network outage. Please use corporate approved formatting. I will be reviewing font sizes, headings, color schemes and ensuring each slide has page numbers. Also please provide a 400 slide appendix for backup. I need this NOW. OR ELSE. Thank you! #playingtowin
7 replies (most recent on top)
Sounds like every RFP bid that sales sits on until 2 days before it is due because sales has no effective leadership. Always ends up having to request an extension which the corporate or govt customer gets super tired of.
Okay, we know what went wrong was one of the engineers we just sent packing was working on a real diversity path instead of all the degrees running the same jacket (sorry last Dir said no money get it up first) and that's the failure (just talking out by butt here). Can you make that 8-10 slides at least please? Sad part is this isn't made up.
Include "Set the Foundation" and "Delight Customers" on the footer. You will be rated based on overall aesthetic of powerpoint, consistent formatting, ease to understand, oh and what the f&ck happened yesterday.
@a6 add some non-binary people, a fat woman with a unibrow/mustache, and….heck just paste in the Jaguar commercial and call it a day
People. People. Dont be so subtle. There are non-Verizon people on this board who MIGHT think you're joking. Or exaggerating. You should make clear that you are dead-on-b^lls accurately representing what goes on every day inside the walls of HQ. It's happening right this very second.
Slide 1 will be Volunteer Hours
Slide 2 will be headcount reductions
Slide 3 will be read Slide 1
Zero chance any DEI Director will provide honest direct accountability feedback!
Don't forget to make it all rainbows and butterflies also, we are purrrrr..fect.