I don't see a point in it, to be honest. A former coworker (we were friendly at work but I wouldn't consider us friends) has asked me several times to meet up for a beer. I politely refused each time (said I had plans already) but the truth is I had no desire to meet up with him. Why would I? As I said, we are not friends and the only tie we had (working together) is gone. And I'm not really at an age where I'm looking to make more friends.
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I left almost 2 years ago, but I still pull strings at my old WF ITR function, and thus my legacy of ineffectiveness continues long after I was fired!
If you don't want to go, don't go. It sounds like you don't have any common ground with this person other than Wells Fargo. I tend to not keep up with any former coworkers either. Once I'm gone or they are gone that's it. No reason to feel bad just keep politely declining.
Uhh, this sounds like the plot for "Cable Guy" if you are suspicious of your co-worker? But seriously, get a grip. It's a trivial decision --- I do not second-guess anyone who offers to buy me a beer.
I don't have out with people that are still with WF! Separation of work and play, I always say.
I'll definitely be laying awake worried about it. Definitely. Yep.
I left Wells Fargo for a different, rapidly growing industry at the beginning of the year. We can't find people fast enough, and I have a list of people in mind who I worked with who I think could also make the jump and translate their technical skills to a new industry. I am reaching out to them - some are engaged, some are dismissive. If someone got off the sinking stagecoach and got in touch with you to catch up, they could be offering a hand to get you out of there as well.
The only thing that's "pathetic" here is that you actually think I care what you think about it. I don't need 68492 friends. If you do, more power to you. No one cares.
Networking shouldn’t be transactional, so the only time you do it is when YOU need help ASAP. If that’s your approach to networking, you’re doing it wrong. It’s an investment, like preventative healthcare except for your career. I’m reminded of the “don’t burn your bridges” strings that pop up here. You never know if the person asking you for help today, will be in a position to help you tomorrow.
No matter how you feel about your coworkers you should always be friendly and cordial on your way out and afterward, even if they aren’t locating in the same city. With the rising of remote jobs, you’ll never know if that one connection can help provide the intel on the company in the future. I think it’s okay to turn down in-person hang out if OP is not up for it. If you are a high performer and developed a good reputation (not an a**ho-e) at Wells, you shouldn’t have issues networking for new opportunities in general.
@ijz+1bB97Uj0 Wow that’s a shame. That was not my experience at all when I was laid off. I even found that 2nd degree connections were super willing to help. My “ask” was never to help me land a job at the company directly though. It was more to get intel on the company, culture, which groups are growing/need my kind of skills etc. if there was a specific job I’d seen posted I would ask if they knew anything about it. Even if they didn’t offer to walk my resume over to the hiring manager, they sometime put in a good word without telling me. It’s not a magic bullet but it gets you past the dreaded applicant screening tool.
I got rebuffed a few times, which sucks. I just moved on, and promised myself I’d be more generous once the tables were turned and I could help other layoff victims
Networking is over rated
You stopped making new friends when you got married.
You are going to love middle age.
I understand networking, but honestly, networking has never worked for me. I have reached out to plenty of former colleagues and former bosses after I lost a job and many of them didn't seem to care. It was surprising especially since I had helped a few when they lost a job. When I needed help, I just got, "Wow, sorry to hear. You can check out our website and apply if you see anything there."
So I am not much of a fan of networking. People have their own problems and don't care about what's going on with you.
You don’t have to meet up if you aren’t comfortable, but maybe it could be helpful to this person and meeting would be a kind gesture. Pay it forward, etc.
Also, you seem to be assuming they want to become “friends” but I suspect they are just trying to network — something we all should be doing in case the layoff reaper comes for us next. They are not necessarily trying to become your BFF.
I have network connections I have occasional coffee or lunch with. I wouldn’t bother if I flat-out disliked them. Networking is hard enough without having to fake liking the person. Doesn’t mean I have a goal of becoming close friends.
Don’t underestimate the importance of networking. I know younger folks don’t understand that but you will need them eventually when your company looks at your age and salary and decides to trade you in for someone younger or offshore. It has happened to be four times and I saw the signs here so I got out before the layoffs hit.
Once you leave, there is nothing left in common. So no for me.
The same age I got married.
I get with what the op means, as well.
I, on the other hand have left companies and have had those coworkers who are still there calling me to tell me about something that has happened that I no longer care about.
I have met some coworkers that I wanted to remain friendly with, but for the most part, when I am gone, I no longer care.
It's very short sighted of you to not keep on good terms with them. Networking is always important.
I can somewhat understand how OP feels. The last thing I want to do is spending the entire time talking about work and people at work and that is exactly what the friend wants to hear. My reporting on a place that he is no longer work for and on the people that he no longer work with but still curious and wanting to hear but mostly the bad things only. I would rather talk about something else that matters. He wants to meet to hear Wells gossips
I've been at WF for almost 25 years. I am still friends with and hang out with some of the folks I've known since the 90s. I am legacy Wachovia/First Union and in those days it was more of a "small community" feel. Many of us went through major events together (mergers, acquisitions, smaller layoffs, relocations) and bonded as a result. In last 10 years I have made acquaintances and have developed many great working relationships versus friends I'd hang out with. I personally believe it is a culture thing. The culture has changed a lot in the last 10 years from a "community" to an "empire". We are just a number (i.d. employee ID) versus someone the firm cares about. Is Corporate America though. Isn't as if our competitors or any large firm is any different.
I never understand that saying when someone says they're at an age where they're not looking to make friends.
I'm friendly and I don't care how old I get, if we got along, I don't mind remaining friendly.
I’m curious. At what age does someone decide they don’t need more friends?
Come work for WF! The only company on the planet which has employees who take time out of their busy day to publicly describe how awful the are!
OP must be a riot at parties.
Yes. We’re like people who went through a war together. Still looking out for each other.
It is called networking. It is good to keep in contact with former coworkers as it can help land jobs.
I have been on both ends of this, helping people get jobs and getting them with help from those I previously worked with.