Starting immediately, all connection center associates must shred all contract paperwork in the kiosk and prepare to ship all phones back as their job has now been replaced by Cricket Wireless employees. The kiosk will undergo a $249.99 remodel to be converted into the signature bright green Cricket Wireless color. This bright blinding color, banners, taylor swift pop music, and a staff of 15 Cricket Wireless associates will help drive aggressive sales.
Studies show millennials are switching to Cricket Wireless faster than ever before. So now when you walk into Sam's Club, you will be greeted by a Cricket Wireless associate at the front door. This associate will say "Make sure to check out the great deals at the Cricket Wireless station ahead!". As the member walks every 4 feet, another Cricket Wireless associate will be there to have a confrontation with the member about buying a phone.
Connection center associates will be offered an exciting new position called "Member Sympathy Ambassador". These MSA associates will be in charge of walking around the store and tasked with constantly apologizing to members for our mistakes such as; no carts in the foyer, no cream puffs, and other floor associates' rude behavior.
"I want to see a brand new Cricket Wireless phone in every members cart" - Gisel R.