Thread regarding Qualcomm Inc. layoffs

What are some home run R&D projects that can get Qualcomm back on top?

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Post ID: @OP+BjX7DUw

15 replies (most recent on top)

The Q-sino! Company-wide betting pool on which execs and employees will be fired, and in what order. But remember...the "house" always wins!

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Post ID: @5xQf+BjX7DUw

Ok, but who would be SPINCO ceo? SM stays as QUALCOMM chief?

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Post ID: @23vg+BjX7DUw

Difficult position for SM and Georgie, need to push the stock up and sustain the dividend... it seems to me we need to do what the activist are clamoring and spin off QCT division. Once the chip division is cut off from the licensing dollar, it will be forced to put a remedy to it's inefficiencies (bloated VP & PM headcount etc) and wake up from it's current sleepy state to keep competition in check.... after spin off Georgie can do some more financial maneuvers to keep the dividend, he might be able to invest a few billions in the stock market on dividend companies that pay higher dividend than QCOM, even invest on Intel stock which has been beating ours for over one year (pays a dividend too!) .... once our CFO has put QCOM stock back on track and the dividend is secured, we can go back to try some innovation and cool projects.

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Post ID: @1A8e+BjX7DUw

Financial Engineering is the only project. http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2015-05-04/dow-fires-1750-after-boosting-share-buyback-program-10-billion

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Post ID: @1C4e+BjX7DUw

Sharks with freaking lasers on their heads.

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Post ID: @1cQz+BjX7DUw

I think one of our brilliant engineers should come up with an algorithm that determines which 10th floor execs should lose their jobs before any layoffs happen to the masses.

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Post ID: @1iL4+BjX7DUw

zero-th

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Post ID: @1xNu+BjX7DUw

new avatars of mediaflo, globalstar

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Post ID: @1OVl+BjX7DUw

Grear idea! Need a super bitter double IPA for the rest n vest crew: "whiny the elder".

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Post ID: @JYT+BjX7DUw
  1. Craft beer microbial research: From the blondest "HR Cheerleader (TM)" pilsner to the peatiest "Ball-breaking PM(TM) stout, Qualcomm's Building K division churns out a veritable infestation of yeasty goodness for consistent craft beer taste and quality. Also, by listing "free beer" as a "perk" for engineering and IT jobs, we get FREE market research across preferred demographics, which allows us to undercut the competition!

  2. Qualcomm Barrista Training Academy. Ray Kroc made a fortune establishing Hamburger U., a training academy for McDonald's burger flippers. Why not apply the same concept to training barristas! By training employees on a PIP plan to pull lattes, terminated employees can be immediately slotted into open Starbucks jobs, thus saving money on unemployment issues.

  3. Qualcomm Employee Placement: For a small fee negotiated during your exit interview, (--and your waiver of rights to sue--) you can have your job search managed by Qualcomm! Afraid you'll be hampered by that heavy accent in your next job? Is your most recent resume a travesty of grammar, syntax and punctuation? Not to worry! The HR "Yenta Patrol" will place you in a job worthy of your skillset, while insuring that you never wind up in a position where you could compromise their IP or valuable trade secrets.

Other than that, I got nothin'.

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Post ID: @GOk+BjX7DUw

It's turtles all the way down.

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Post ID: @CMB+BjX7DUw

sucking on the teat of the U.S. Wermacht is never a bad option. Works for Boeing, and even Google with their killer, er, friendly robot division.

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Post ID: @zZr+BjX7DUw

Isn't there an internal innovation program/engine that incubates new ideas? What's coming out of there?

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Post ID: @yeI+BjX7DUw

Good one.

The thing is, Q is old and bloated. If you are a young engineer you are far better off finding the up and coming company working on that project, whatever it might be, where you will receive far more return for your effort.

Qualcomm has divested itself of most of the brilliance it over had, and is now lawyers and grindstones. It has nothing new to bring to the table except incremental silicon improvements in a fairly narrow and more comparative market.

And it no longer trusts engineers to give them time and resources to incubate great ideas.

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Post ID: @bDZ+BjX7DUw

Just one word. Plastics

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Post ID: @hEu+BjX7DUw

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