It began, as these things often do, with a badge scan and a fruit tray.
Robin Vince and the Executive Committee descended upon Lake Mary two weeks ago, bringing with them a whirlwind of strategic platitudes, pre-cleared talking points, and a palpable sense of curated warmth. The site was abuzz. Floors were vacuumed. Acronyms were polished. Someone even replaced the “Out of Order” sign on the espresso machine with “Temporarily Visioning a Better Brew.”
The town hall began promptly, or as it’s known in EC time, at “Empathy O’Clock.” Robin opened with a heartfelt nod to “the incredible work happening here,” followed by a 17-minute meditation on resilience, stakeholder trust, and the importance of “showing up”—which, ironically, most of the EC had not done since the last earnings call.
The Q&A was pre-screened, of course. No questions about layoffs, offshoring, or why the new “Agile Transformation Hub” is just a SharePoint folder with a GIF of a hamster on a wheel. Instead, we heard about “listening deeply,” “leading with heart,” and “unlocking the power of our people”—phrases that sound profound until you realize they mean absolutely nothing and cost nothing to say.
Enter James Legrand, our site lead and resident Zen Buddha philosopher-king of LinkedIn. Within hours, his post appeared:
"Leadership is not a destination. It is a sunrise reflected in the eyes of those we serve. Grateful for Robin's visit and the reminder that empathy is a verb."
What does that mean? No one knows. But it got 247 likes, mostly from new recent new hire analysts and people who also post about “intentional gratitude” and “the ROI of kindness.”
One associate commented, “So true, James. I felt the empathy in the hallway.” Another chapped lips sympathizer fabio-sly replied, “I didn’t see Robin but I felt him.” We’re still unsure if that was metaphorical or HR-worthy.
Meanwhile, back at our desks, nothing changed. The org chart still resembles a game of Jenga played during an earthquake. The “transformation” roadmap is now in version 6.2b. And the only thing cascading is the mandatory empathy training module, which now includes a quiz on “active listening postures.”
But hey—Robin gestured (while admiring his new Rolex). The EC smiled. James posted. And somewhere, a hamster keeps running and more jobs are lost in this heartless and unemotional chaos.