1) everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end.
2) If live gives you lemons but you got no sugar, your lemonade is going to s---.
3) Crisis Survival Cheat Sheet Written by Mike
This sheet includes a summary of the four crisis survival strategies:
Distraction, Self-soothing, improving the moment and Pros and Cons.
You may find it helpful to print it out and keep it handy as a reference while you practice the skills.
Distraction using A C C E P T S
Find one or more of the following strategies that works for you. When you become aware that you're upset, or are about to do something that will make matters worse (e.g., d--gs, drinking, shopping, overeating, gambling, etc.) use one of these that works for you instead.
Activities — Do something fun and constructive, perhaps with a friend.
Contribute — Volunteer or offer to help someone out.
Comparisons — Put things in perspective by comparing your situation to
something worse.
Opposite Emotions — What are you feeling? Do something that evokes the
opposite emotion.
Push Away — Imagine the painful thought as something physical and
visualize pushing it away.
Other Thoughts — Engage your mind in active challenging thoughts.
Sensations — Shock your system to invoke your lower brain functions.
Self-Soothing / Five Senses
Please yourself using each of your five senses when you feel your "emotional temperature" rising (you are angry) or feel yourself about to reach for a dysfunctional behavior..
Vision — Look at something that you enjoy looking at. A picture on your wall or computer, a well decorated section of your home. Something that you've created, built or taken care of (a well polished
car, piece of artwork, picture, decoration)..
Hearing — What do you enjoy listening to? Enjoyable music; put on the radio or mp3 player. Birds chirping or a babbling brook, find a nearby park or wooded area and go there when you need to calm down, or buy a nature sounds CD or sound-soother.
Smell — What do you like to smell? Spray your favorite cologne or perfume and savor the scent. Go to a florist or garden and enjoy the smell of the flowers. Go to a bakery and smell the bread baking, or
the produce section and smell the fresh fruit. You can also get some aroma therapy oils or incense, whatever you find pleasing.
Taste — Have a small snack of fresh fruit and savor each bite. Enjoy a good meal (keep it within reason, especially if you have problems with eating). Drink something flavorful like a cup of good coffee or tea, a smoothy or fresh-squeeze fruit juice. Take a piece of candy or gum and pay attention to the flavor.
Touch — Sit in a hot tub or warm bath. Get a massage. Go outside and gently stroke the grass or a plant. Find a comfortable piece of furniture and relax on it. Put some lotion on your body. Lie on or
wrap yourself in something luxurious like a comfortable bathrobe or gown, perhaps a clean crisp bed sheet or soft towel.
I M P R O V E the Moment
Find ways to make the situation more tolerable. No situation is completely bad. Look for the positives and allow yourself to accept them. Use these strategies, remember the acronym I M P R O V E.
Imagery — Visualize a comfortable, relaxing place and imagine yourself there. Allow yourself to believe that everything is or will go well, you will be able to handle the situation and make it through.
Meaning — Look for a hidden purpose for what's going on, think of your own values and priorities in life. Find the good in what's going on. When things get rough, remind yourself of the value, the good that will come of this.
Prayer — If you're religious, prayer or faith can often help you think in more positive terms. Remember the mindfulness skills, separate the facts from your judgments.
Relaxation —Use whatever relaxation techniques work for you. Slowly take a deep breath, hold it for a moment then relax and let out all the air. Progressive Muscle relaxation can be effective here, tighten
and relax each muscle group.
One thing at a time — Remember the mindfulness "How" skills. Focus on what's going on at this very moment, and free your mind of other thoughts and distractions.
Brief Vacation —Get away for a short period of time. Take a timeout, and go for a walk. Go camping for a day. Go spend the night at a bed and breakfast or motel somewhere nice. Stay with a friend one night. Sit and meditate and allow your mind to go on an imaginary vacation.
Encouragement —If a friend of yours were in your situation, and you were telling them that they'll make it through, what would you say to them? Tell yourself those very same words, in your head. Repeat it many times to drive the message home to yourself..
Pros and Cons
Take a rational, analytical approach by figuring out the benefits and drawbacks of the situation. Go away for a moment, go into another room, if you're having problems getting away briefly, take a trip to the bathroom. List out the following things, and review the list. This can help us put things in perspective.
Pros and Cons of Tolerating — List out the pros and cons of tolerating
the stressful situation.
Pros and Cons of Not Tolerating — List the pros and cons of avoiding the situation, getting angry, or resorting to some dysfunctional behavior.
Positive Outcome — List the final outcome, if you can stick it out.
Repercussions — If you can't make it through, what will the repercussions be?
Bonus tip:
Write, scribble or draw with your weak hand – it’s nearly impossible to stay angry or self-destructive when forcing the level of concentration needed to perform this task.