It is the worst company I have ever worked for in terms of it’s appalling people culture. Work place psychiatrists will be using it as a case history for corporate dysfunctionality and underperformance for years to come. If you have worked there for many years and you are going to another company it is highly recommended you get your personality assessed first before moving.
38 replies (most recent on top)
Slb greatest trick getting people to work to exhausted and broken on farcical opposing objectives and tell them at the same time ... you work for the best company on the world why would you leave.
They offered me a job in Chad but there was no salary for it. Its all right getting the free internet access and food but we really needs to get paid for what we do
Ho could anyone enjoy the culture in SLB? Read below first before deciding
I kinda enjoy the culture in SLB but then again i am a real competitive animal and will do whatever is needed to win
Slb is a multi national company and there does not exist “Foreign cultures” in the company. There is only the SLB culture which is a very sick one as can be read below
A good example of the sick and deranged management culture in the company. Too much influence from certain foreign cultures where this kind of thing is acceptable
Yup - 6 APs got me a VP position, international pension and paid for my villa in the Bahamas 🇧🇸
After the 3 rd one you start to enjoy it actually
What is DP?
AP is a process that employees go through, starting at lower level management, that opens the door to higher level positions. It’s given to them from deviant higher level managers but considered an essential initiation or passage of rites to reach the higher echelons of executive management.
AP = Anal Penetration
what does AP stand for?
Don’t equate all oilfield service companies management style with the draconian deranged Schlumberger methods
It is truly a vile company culture
Don’t expect too much in oil service companies. Many people can’t be trusted and come from rough background. Dishonesty is acceptable in this environment so you live with it or you leave.
Disagree, we know how business work, if things about to collaspe we just layoff, then hire. Slb still stay on top
When everything is a mess the only thing to do is be greedy and look to boost your bank account. Don’t worry who you step on as dog eat dog rules.
In Smith we embraced the transformation and it really did transform the company.
We lost all our experienced people and our business is now a mess and declining every day
Good luck Cameron with that
SLB people spend their time filling out Quest info, politicking, transformation BS and maybe once in a while we can visit a client and tell them how brilliant we are but this is the least enjoyable part of the job. Usually we expect the clients to come visit us because we are the best and they damn well know it.
Cameron is an “old tech” company and still in the past with outdated ideas about how work gets done but we will change that very quickly
Just need to get a few more of our SLB managers into the key Cameron positions and let the transformation work its magic
We sit, eat, talk, powerpoint slides, make joke and that is all. Oh i forgot we collect paycheck too
Cameron person here. Can anyone tell me what SLB does??? Everyone I talk to in SLB seems like they collect paychecks for doing nothing 75% of the time. Cameron side works their asses off.
Aggressive bullying of employees and harsh working conditions are what develops our top managers.
No wonder the majority of them develop mental health issues in later life. A truly dysfunctional company led by a dysfunctional and over paid underperforming management team.
Agree it is the worse place I every worked at. The way I got treated was a disgrace. Hated the place. Took voluntary redundancy and never regretted it. But I would add when I had the right manager it was a good job. But then with the wrong manager it was the worse job. And not only managers lies and deceit from supervisors along with rude arrogant bullying team leads. A culture that in my experience permitted to all levels. A good few years experience behind these comments.
Having worked as a manager for 20 years I left with a serious case of what my therapist calls Schlumberger Psychotic behavior
Let me share my symptoms in the hope it can help others avoid this disease:
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strong Desire to be better than everybody and take the credit for all success
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Lying and cheating to get best performance reviews including engaging in AP with my Arab boss 5 tines
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Blame others for failures
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Loved firing people so it made me feel powerful
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Playing politics always to be seen as the boss and a success
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S---ing up to my boss and always tell him he is my leadership example
In the end I spent 1 year on a Buddhist retreat to get me back to being a normal person. I was a very sick person but recovering and am doing fine now thankfully
Love ❤️ and light 💡 to all
Not all managers are bad, although you only need few mofos to f everything and company.
There will be nothing left of this place in 10 years, pensions, whatever savings funds, or stocks. This camel is done, sat down, kicked to get up way to many times, and is simply ready to get it over with.
Only the losers betraying everyone to hang on will be standing there in the end complaining where their stuff went. It's hilarious to watch!
McD is waiting for y'all genetic misfits. Don't you wish you done something else with your life when you were younger! Hahaha
I am not aware of any other company in the world who accepts AP as a means of getting promoted
It’s highly degrading and onexwinderd how this type of thing started in the company. I am told it was “imported” from an Arab country but can’t sure which one
Hey the only thing I’m interested in is to backstab my buddies I work with. Nothing else.
This company is underperforming vs. its peers. Culture as described below very much shows the reasons for such. A bunch of inexperienced mislead low educated children. Redundancies and "lack of fear" to put someone into the street? What is wrong with you people? You don't know anything and your existence is on a thread like everyone else. You'll be treated the same way as you behave yourself. Just a matter of time. Politics in exchange for profits and a meaningful life. Stupid scum. I'm talking... Ignorant fools! Your mom and kids will be so proud of you!
If you want to get promoted you must prove that you have the cojones to fire people when needed. You must be a tough hard guy ready to do anything for the business performance. Just convince your boss if this and you will do fine
SLB seems to think these napoleonic little frogs are good for business....
Our success comes from a brutal focus in results. This is how we win
No time for fluffy people policies.
Play to win at all costs to go somewhere else. Of course you need highly honed political skills to succeed
Congratulation, you are true whornament of SLB. They need more to make SLB bigger
To get the villa in the Bahamas I took the AP route. A bit painful but very rewarding. Now I don't have to look I've my shoulder for anybody. It's all straight ahead.
Actually I quite enjoy the challenge of it. If you have to backstab somebody to get promoted so what? This is how the game is played and everybody knows that
The feeling of success that I get when we over deliver on our numbers is hugely satisfying for me and we are well rewarded for it. Of course I make sure that I am seen by upper management as the person delivering on those result but I also help out the other guys on the team and give them good performance reviews. If they try to go against me then they know what will happen so nobody is foolish enough to try that
Success and a growing bank account are my main motivators and personal relationships and all that feels good fuzzy stuff is not good for business
Yeah me too - 15 years turned me into a pathological political schemer always trying to outdo my colleagues and get promoted. My wife and kids left me when I took all this stress home with me. I am from west Texas
I worked there for 10 years and I came out like an oilfield version of American Psycho. I truly regret the way I manipulated and treated my employees
I am from Cairo in Egypt
5 years of therapy and working in another company with a softer people focused culture has finally got me less neurotic and able to function in a “normal” company again
Everyone is same nothing to do with middle eastern or Japanese, although Egyptian from Africa are the worst ones.
Personality assessment is highly recommend.
F---ing objective style, modern days slaves
You should notice this at 1st year,dont let that name SLB fool you
I agree especially French buffoons, playing politics is their agenda instead getting things done!!
So true especially if you have an authoritarian tendency in your personality. These kind of people excel in the company and tend to come from Middle Eastern countries