Thread regarding Schlumberger Ltd. layoffs

Anybody got any good jokes?

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| 3171 views | | 21 replies (last October 2, 2016) | Reply
Post ID: @OP+JuedxDy

21 replies (most recent on top)

Yeah, 'cos they have the Crisis in front and the Creditors behind...

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Post ID: @buxo+JuedxDy

‘’The Worst Is Behind Us’’

It must be a good one as it has been trotted out continuously for the last two years.

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Post ID: @bjkn+JuedxDy

Do you mean the SETC TED Talk by Susie Rosebush showing petro-experts how to tie their shoes?

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Post ID: @5svi+JuedxDy

SETC system

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Post ID: @4vbz+JuedxDy

Captain Paul on the weather: "in spite of the continuing headwinds we now appear to have reached the bottom of the cycle"

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Post ID: @4mqp+JuedxDy

Please go about your work and stop worrying, the layoffs are over! 🤔

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Post ID: @2jhf+JuedxDy

As a former cameron hand to mouth this union looks like a good fit. Righty tighty, lefty loosely,you would not believe how many new hires i told this. What a joke. Just like the survey!!!

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Post ID: @1tdn+JuedxDy

As a former cameron hand to mouth this union looks like a good fit. Righty tighty, lefty loosely,you would not believe how many new hires i told this. What a joke. Just like the survey!!!

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Post ID: @1aml+JuedxDy

SLB execs screw people, not lightbulbs.

Gotta say I love the one about the universe revolving!

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Post ID: @1vqi+JuedxDy

$3.2 Billion Dollar drilling project in Venezuela

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Post ID: @1mjs+JuedxDy

It only takes one SLB executive to change a lightbulb. He holds the bulb in the socket and the universe revolves around him.

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Post ID: @1mpj+JuedxDy

Managers call an emergency meeting (off-site, wink-wink) to discuss why the light bulb failed, whose responsibility it was to choose the light bulb, and why there is no one to change the light bulb out for a new one.

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Post ID: @1toc+JuedxDy

Florence Kentucky management. Now there is a joke for ya!

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Post ID: @1tta+JuedxDy

Manager can light a bulb by inserting it in themselves. Slb manager and team leads are the biggest cause of a self loathing workforce.

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Post ID: @rcf+JuedxDy

Don't be ridiculous, a single slb manager can change a lightbulb...it just needs to be 'approved' by 5 executives first

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Post ID: @thd+JuedxDy

https://youtu.be/zSi-yCV-gQ4

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Post ID: @iiv+JuedxDy

one to observe it needs changed, one to intervene by entering a quest to change it, one to enter a SQ because maintenance hasn't changed it yet, and a couple more to discuss how they need to cut costs on the manufacturing floor so that they can have better lightbulbs on executive row.

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Post ID: @rcx+JuedxDy

That is if they know what a screw is

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Post ID: @cia+JuedxDy

how many executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

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Post ID: @zim+JuedxDy

ha! all three of those are hilarious!

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Post ID: @jfz+JuedxDy

Let's see...

ITT Transformation

Engage to Excel survey

SLB management

...

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Post ID: @zby+JuedxDy

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