To the guy who hate's Safety
6 replies (most recent on top)
Yeah that person must be on drugs.
I tend to agree with this. We just got a new safety guy and all I see is him visiting with everyone. Sometimes with a pretense of safety.
Oh god. We get it already. You don't like safety. We don't need a new post about it every second day.
When the free floating tidbits of disdain traveling around the universe for WTF crystallize into cosmic karma crystals, I will use one of them to power my light sabre, then perform a level 999 limit break, and transcend the astral plane of WTF Labs in a super massive explosion of light, color, and pure unadulterated intellectual mind seeds.
As they bloom into the Flowers of Desecration, I will hand out the precious flowers as souvenirs to my mortal enemies while processing the significance of antimatter wormholes.
As I travel traverse the darkest corners of space and time through my wormhole friends and family, the Flowers of Desecration that bloomed in my frontal lobe will flourish into quantum singularities swallowing my mortal enemies and digesting them into an unknown pit of antithetical logic culminating from the intergalactic knowledge the universe has gathered in its travels through all known and unknown universes and timelines.
They will only exist in the form of Facebook pages.
Finally, at the end of time itself, where nothing exists but chaos and unimaginable desolation, I will open my eyes for the last time waking from an infinite slumber...
..of 3 seconds traveling at the speed of light to the 8th power. But the eight grew tired and fell on its side, now making it to the power of infinity I suppose.. Which is basically the speed that impulses manifest themselves in the unconscious...
Fully awake, and with my eyes being gateways into the mysteries of the great cosmogenesis of 2006, I shall eliminate WTF Labs as I float above the mountains with a single inkling of a thought, and I will feel pleased with what I have done.
Then there will be peace known throughout all universes...
..and then I will die full of regret because I could have been using my creativity doing something productive instead of wasting it on WTF Labs.
Honestly, we need more safety people. I would gladly give up my job to hire more safety people.
Every night I get home after a safe day at work, I say a silent prayer for the safety people. We are lucky to have them.