My Dearest Firm,
I have got to be honest in that nothing you say at this point can impact me in any way. This has gone on far too long. And to such extremes. I am numb to the tactic. Nothing you say or do can scare me or make me happy. You cannot incentivize me with a carrot or a stick. Maybe this is what you have wanted all along. A firm of automatons.
The only drawback I can see for you is that your automatons will no longer go above and beyond. Neither carrot nor stick will incentivize. What good is it? We don’t keep or lose our job based on our performance. We don’t get a bigger raise. We don’t get our work from home approved. We don’t get an office when we do go back to the soul-deprivation-chamber when we may have had one before.
Punch in. Punch out. Use all of my sick days. Thank you for my service. Have a nice evening. Have a nice life.
Love,
Your Faithful Automaton