Let's turn all those negative feelings you have into something creative and write Haikus! Remember, that's a poem of seventeen syllables, in three lines of five, seven, and five.
I'll start:
Who's bad at layoffs,
And they do it every year?
ConocoPhillips.
FU Bartlesville.
The headquarters is Houston.
FU Anchorage.
Dear Uncle Ryan,
Working for this company
Took years off my life
My manager is
Afraid that they will get cut.
Oh, I'm just kidding.
Old boys with new toys
Strategy in the rear view
Permian playground
If you hate your job
Then leave for that better job
Oh, no better job?
Emailed my V-CIP
Eighty percent is a joke
Meets expectations
ConocoPhillips
The “P” company of choice.
Unemployment line
I go to office
I restart computer
I go to restroom
Sycophants to stiffs
Managing up, not for us
Shiny powerpoints
We were great.
It was fun.
Now we are done.
Farewell coworkers.
Management screwed us again.
Incompetent clowns.
FU to Haiku